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A Hunter Spots A Grizzly Bear

A hunter spots a grizzly bear 1,000 yards away, but due to some thick bushes he can’t get any closer, so he aims his rifle and fires.

He can see he’s hit the bear, so he chases after it.

When he finally catches up to the bear, the bear is clutching his shoulder and says,

“Was it you who shot me?” The hunter says, “Sure was.”

The bear says, “You need to be taught a lesson.”

The bear strips off the hunter’s clothes, bends him over, and has his way with him.

Several minutes later the hunter struggles to his feet, pulls himself together, and vows to find that bear.

He searches through the woods, up and over hills, and then he spots it 500 yards away.

He takes aim with his rifle, pulls the trigger, can see that he pegged it right in the leg, and sets off after it.

When he catches up to the bear, the bear says,

“Did you shoot me again?”

The hunter, trembling, says, “Yes.”

The bear says,

“Well, maybe this will teach you,”

whereupon it grabs up the hunter, rips off his already tattered clothing, throws him violently to the ground, and really rips him a new one.

The hunter eventually gets to his feet, bared and dazed, and he decides he’s going after the bear one more time.

He trips through dense underbrush, he trudges through soupy swamps, and he treks across vast valleys, and finally he finds the bear only a hundred yards away, across a small opening.

He takes careful aim, holds his breath, and pulls the trigger.

The hunter, already exhausted, sprints up to the bear.

The bear says, “Did you shoot me AGAIN?”

The hunter says, “Yep.”

So the bear says,

“You didn’t really come here to hunt, did you?”

The Lost Coat

Dad asked me for the Vaseline